Category Archives: TV

Oh right, I have a blog! Maybe I should stop sucking at it. No lame excuses, I’m just going to list my favourite Christmas episodes from some of my fave TV shows instead.

I’m not really, like, a Christmas Person, so sappy, sentimental, emotional episodes about the importance of family or the spirit of giving or whatever don’t really do it for me. I mean, I get that most Christmas episodes have some heart to them, but the show has to somehow subvert the typical schmaltz for me to really appreciate it. Here’s my list.

festivus

5. Seinfeld – The Strike. In this episode, George’s friends find out about his father’s made up holiday, Festivus, which the Costanzas celebrated during George’s childhood thanks to Frank Costanza’s hatred of the commercialism of the holiday. I can kind of relate to this, because my dad has always had a Scrooge-like attitude toward Christmas, and he demonstrated it by acting out in weird ways – like the year he gave me and my sister a wrapped box of Hamburger Helper for no reason. ALSO, while he got all grouchy about putting up Christmas lights, he insisted on celebrated Groundhog Day every year, by putting up pictures of groundhogs and eating KFC, the traditional food of Groundhog Day (duh).

Essentially Frank is a crazier version of my father. So as we learn during the episode, Festivus eschews the traditional tree in favour of a Festivus Pole, and you can tell your family members how they disappointed you during the Airing of Grievances. Kramer immediately gets into the spirit of the non-existent holiday, and it ends with George being attacked by his father during the traditional Feats of Strength. I probably don’t have to tell you this is a great episode; there aren’t many fake holidays that have become an incredibly famous pop culture reference, after all.

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4. American Dad – For Whom the Sleigh Bell Tolls. It’s weird how, as Family Guy has gotten lazier and less funny over the years, American Dad has stayed consistently hilarious. It always goes into really bizarre, over-the-top territory, and its Christmas episodes are especially ridiculous. They’ve all been great, but this one, where the Smith family inadvertently ends up killing Santa Claus, is my personal favourite. Santa doesn’t stay dead (you know, because he’s Santa) and he ends up leading a battle against the Smiths with weapon-wielding elves, reindeer and some kind of horrifying snowman monster on his side.

There’s also a whole weird subplot where Roger befriends a bootlegger, learns the art of bootlegging himself, and then the bootlegger helps fight Santa’s army. Oh, and by the end, Stan accepts Haley’s husband Jeff into the family…but only after he proves himself by viciously attacking Santa. So you know, there is some nice family junk, but mostly it’s just typically weird American Dad, and it’s awesome.

misfits

3. Misfits – Christmas Special. What’s more perverse than killing Santa? Killing Jesus, of course. Yep, Misfits, which is kind of the British anti-Heroes, totally goes there in their Christmas special at the end of the second season. OK, it’s not ACTUALLY Jesus. The gang finishes their community service, and they quickly realize they don’t have a lot of real world skills (mystical stom-induced super powers don’t count) and they’re totally broke. They end up selling their powers for cash, but at the same time, a disenchanted priest buys a whole bunch of powers to convince people he’s the second coming of Christ. Mostly he uses his new abilities to steal money and force girls to sleep with him, so killing him kind of makes sense.

The gang also realizes that selling their powers was a bad idea, and they end up getting new ones, just in time for a bit of a season three retooling. The episode ALSO features the grossest television birth I’ve ever seen, courtesy of Nathan’s new, incredibly crude girlfriend. Normally I would hate this, but Misfits managed to make me laugh about placenta. It’s a Christmas miracle!

community

2. Community – Abed’s Uncontrollable Christmas. This is just a great episode of a great show. Obviously Community isn’t afraid to get weird with its structure and format, and in this episode it goes full-on claymation when Abed has a break with reality. In an attempt to figure out what happened and help revert Abed’s world back to normal, everyone goes on a magical Christmas adventure…through Abed’s subconscious.

It works amazingly well as a stand-alone episode, incorporating traditional claymation moments, from periodic songs to especially delicious looking food. But it also incorporates the individual personalities of each member of the study group, while delving deeper into some of Abed’s family life, and the things that make him the lovable pop culture obsessed weirdo he is. It’s a great showcase of all the things Community does best.

sunny

1. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia – A Very Sunny Christmas.  It’s always Sunny is completely deranged at the best of times, but their Christmas episode really escalated things to the next level. It turns out Dennis and Dee hate Christmas, because Frank ruined their childhood by buying them amazing gifts and then keeping them for himself. When he buys the car Dennis has always wanted and the designer purse of Dee’s dreams, the Reynolds twins decide to plot revenge in the form of A Christmas Carol, using Frank’s old business partner to revisit Frank’s past, present and future. This leads to my absolute favourite moment on the show – Dennis and Dee want Frank to hear people at his old company saying bad things about him, so he hides in a couch…and jumps out of it, dripping sweat and completely naked in the middle of the company Christmas party. Maybe it’s just me, but I literally can’t think of anything funnier than a naked, sweaty Danny Devito.

In the meantime, Mac and Charlie try to get into the Christmas spirit my reminiscing about their family traditions. Except once they start talking about them, Mac realizes his family stole presents from their neighbours, and Charlie comes to the horrifying realization that his mother was a prostitute who slept with dudes dressed like Santa. He seems to be OK with this revelation, until he goes to the mall, sees Santa and snaps. Charlie attacks, and it’s pretty brutal. As in, it ends with Santa’s blood dripping from Charlie’s mouth. Awkward!

On the bright side, Frank does decide to change his ways after a concussion-induced claymation hallucination in which he’s eviscerated by his friends. Unfortunately, his business partner steals the gifts he gets everyone. The gang sort of gets a happy ending by bringing back Mac and Charlie’s favourite Christmas tradition: throwing rocks at cars. It’s completely perverse, but kind of sweet for It’s Always Sunny, really. I mean, they learn a valuable lesson and spend bonding time together. The gang doesn’t get much nicer than that.

So, are there any other ridiculous, wacky, funny or possibly disgusting Christmas episodes I’m missing? Suggestions are welcome. I’m not really into Christmas movies that aren’t It’s a Wonderful Life, Bad Santa or Love Actually, so clearly I need to watch TV to get into the spirit.

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Fox has an impressively strong Tuesday lineup this fall, with two returning sitcoms and two new ones. So far, I’m very much enjoying all of them. Unlike CBS, Fox seems to recognize that it’s 2012, so they’ve moved away from the multi-camera, laugh track set-up, making way for shows that I would say are funnier and more relevant.

Raising Hope

This show is crazy underrated. The premise is maybe a bit kooky – a lower class guy named Jimmy Chance who lives with his parents (played by the amazing Martha Plimpton and Garret Dillahunt) knocks up a serial killer who gives birth in jail before being sent to the electric chair. Jimmy is left to raise the baby, Hope. The whole concept could have easily come across as offensive, since it’s basically about a struggling, undereducated family doing the best they can. Fortunately the whole thing is so funny, and the Chance family so obviously a loving, well-meaning unit, that it just makes for good television. OK, sometimes it goes a bit off the rails with Jimmy’s great-grandmother, Maw Maw, who suffers from dementia and is played by Cloris Leachman, but on the other more important hand, Cloris Leachman running around in a bra being racist is pretty hilarious.

The other thing that makes the show notable is that it’s done a great job of creating a whole world, filled with recurring characters like Jimmy’s coworkers at the grocery store where he works and random weirdos in the neighbourhood, like Dancing Dan. I feel like I don’t know many people who watch this show as it enters it’s third season, but you should be, because there isn’t a lot of television that’s so heartwarming and actually funny.

Ben and Kate

I like this show – I do! But I’m also kind of a little bored of it at the same time? I think the problem is that critics seem to be obsessed with it and they’re all calling it the best new comedy of the year and junk, and so far I just think it’s OK. Basically it’s about Kate, who has her life together mostly and has a kid, but then her irresponsible brother, Ben moves in with her. And hilarious shenanigans ensue! Oh and also Ben has a friend who has always had a crush on Kate, and Kate works with a girl played by Judy Punch who is hilarious and the best part of the show.

I want to reiterate that I do like this show! I just don’t love it, yet. But I feel like I could, given time. And more Judy Punch. Her character’s name is BJ, btw. Just putting that out there. Even without her, each episode has had a good amount of funny moments. Like when Ben ugly cried, that was good. So far it all just feels kind of generic and somewhat unmemorable, though. But I’m still looking forward to seeing what they’re going to do next.

New Girl

When this started last year, I mean, I watched every episode, obviously, but I kind of wrote it off as stupid and I was just watching it because it was on (when you watch as much TV as I do, this is a valid reason to watch a show). But something happened halfway through last season where it went beyond Zooey Deschanel’s whole adorkable persona and became a show about four totally different personalities coming together and making their quirky lives work together. AW. Also, it got pretty legitimately funny. Like, I laugh out loud when I watch it by myself. I think what makes it good is that it’s not afraid to be totally weird. I like that Schmidt is anal about things like cleanliness and cooking but also is forced to contribute to a douchebag jar, and Nick is literally just a cranky old man who hates young people things, but also becomes obsessed with random things and people on the regular.

And yes, obviously Nick and Jess are going to get together eventually, but the show is pretty good at building tension between them without hitting us over the head with it constantly. It’s addressed, but not in a totally annoying obnoxious way, just in a way where it’s clear they are just not at that place yet but they will be eventually! Yes. This show is a good show.

The Mindy Project

This isn’t super amazing great yet, but I think it’s going to be. I don’t know what it is, but I just really like Mindy Kaling and I like watching her do things, whatever those things might be. I do think the show is best when it focuses on the work comedy aspects of the gynecologist office where she works, but even when it’s all, blah blah, rom com, dating is hard, etc., I totally enjoy it. It’s weird to watch a show like this, or Girls, because there is a woman who is the lead, who is obviously not fat in real life, but is TV fat. That maybe sounds terrible, but you know what I mean. I could not fit my hand around Mindy Kaling’s upper arm, you know? I hate that I notice that, but I DO notice that, and then I’m glad that I’m seeing it on my television.

I think what’s really going to make this show great is the new nurse, played by Ike Barinholtz. He’s spent time in prison, and is kind of a wild card, but he also means well. AW! And then also there’s the antagonistic doctor Mindy works with, played by Chris Messina who Mindy has fun banter with and also, I freaking love Chris Messina. I almost even liked him in The Newsroom, and we all know how I feel about The Newsroom. The show is still kind of all over the place, but there have only been a few episodes, and I have faith that when it gets its bearings, it’s going to be delightful.

So, Fox Tuesdays – very entertaining and a lot of potential! They’re like the new NBC Thursdays. Which I’ll probably address next week.


So, obviously I’ve been failing pretty badly at blogging. Mostly this is because I’ve been out of town every weekend for the last month and a half, which has caused my life to feel like it’s in turmoil (it’s not really, but I start to get stressed when I don’t spend, like, 70 per cent of my time in my apartment). Anyway, excuses, excuses, blah blah boring.

Even though I haven’t been writing about it, I’ve at least been WATCHING television. A lot of my stories have started back up over the last few weeks. Because I watch way too many shows (seriously, it’s out of control) I’m going to do a few posts where I talk about blocks of shows that air on a certain network on a certain night.

CBS is not my favourite network. Mostly I feel like it specializes in old people dramas and pandering comedies with laugh tracks. Though supposedly The Good Wife is legitimately good, and it’s on my list of Shows I Should Probably Eventually Watch Some Day. Anyway, I do watch it on Mondays, though it’s starting to feel more like a chore than anything. The real problem is that I’ve invested way too much time in…

How I Met Your Mother

I completely admit that this show is generally bad, but I’ve been watching it for a few years and it seems like at the absolute MOST it has another two seasons left in it, so how can I stop now? Do I care who the mother is? No. Am I increasingly annoyed by the show’s generally misogynistic attitude? Kind of. Do I think Ted is the most boring, whiny, annoying lead character EVER? Hell yes. But I will not give up! I’m stubborn, OK?

It’s not all bad, though. I still really like Robin, and I mostly like Marshall and Lily and Barney are OK. I feel like there aren’t as many actually funny episodes as there used to be (see: Slapsgiving) but I’m still invested enough in the characters for whatever reason that I want to know what happens to them. Kind of. In a really passive, “meh” sort of way. Mostly I just try to ignore the gimmicks – the mother thing, the way they show misleading clips of the future, etc., and just enjoy it as mindless entertainment.

Partners

Oh CBS, you are so sneaky, putting this piece of crap between two more watchable shows. I’ve only seen two episodes of this so far, but since I’m compelled to watch 2 Broke Girls (more on that nonsense later) I suspect I’m going to see a lot more. And I can say with a reasonable amount of confidence that I won’t enjoy any of them. OK, I didn’t see the premiere, but the basic premise is, there are two friends – one is gay, one is straight – who work together as architects or some fake job that only people on TV have. The straight one is uptight or something and the gay one seems to be into meddling, because, you know, stereotypes. They get into wacky situations! In the latest episode, the straight one’s fiancee slept with Derek Jeter a long time ago, which made the straight guy mad, and the gay one was obsessed with the game Celebrity. THERE WERE MANY REFERENCES TO VARIOUS FAMOUS PEOPLE. I think they were meant to be funny?

Ugh, obviously this show is so terrible. Its selling point is that it was made by the creators of Will & Grace, but there is no Jack and Karen and everyone knows Will and Grace were the worst. It’s the kind of show that maybe would have seemed edgy in 1997, but even then only old people would have thought that. Now it just feels unfunny and the more I think about it, I might just have to take a TV break between my Monday night shows, because I’m not sure I can handle this schlock week after week.

2 Broke Girls

I have watched every episode of this show and I’m not really sure why. I just feel like if almost everything about it was different, it could be super good. Seriously! The thing that is good about it now is the relationship between the titular (hehe, titular) broke girls. One has always been broke, the other is a former rich girl, and all they want is to create a successful cupcake business. AWW! They have good banter and sometimes they’re funny and I kind of love Kat Dennings. Everything else, unfortunately, is not great. There is a horse that lives outside their Brooklyn apartment. Most of the cultural references are crazy outdated. Everyone else at the diner where they work is an offensive stereotype. So. Many. Vagina jokes. It tries so hard to be crude, which would be fine if it was funnier, but…last night’s episode was basically just all pee jokes. PEE JOKES!

Whatever though, I still think the girls feel like real friends, and there are moments when the plot is OK! Last season there was an excellent hoarder episode, which maybe I only liked because I am fascinated by hoarders, but still. I also liked when they met Caroline’s (the rich one) imprisoned father in the second season premiere. But the last couple episodes have been…not good, so the season is shaping up to be…not great.

I guess my verdict is that probably you shouldn’t watch CBS on Mondays if you’re looking for quality, intelligent television that’s in any way compelling or deep or particularly good. But Mondays are hard, man, so mindless junk is important too. And it’s not like I watch Mike & Molly or anything. I love Melissa McCarthy, but even I can’t handle a show that’s one giant fat joke.


The last couple seasons of Project Runway have been totally lacklustre. Most recently, there was Project Runway All Stars, which was essentially a different show due to the different host and judges. I didn’t even watch the whole thing because it was just sooo obvious Mondo (who should have won his season) was going to win. I wasn’t going to go through a Heidi-less season for such an obvious conclusion. Anyway, the season before that was AWFUL. It was that one where Nina was obsessed with Anya, who could not sew and all her clothes looked the same, AND THEN SHE WON. Actually no one in that season was particularly great though, so whatever.

Anyway, it’s not like I really watch Project Runway for the clothes. Sure, that’s part of it – watching a designer create an entire beautiful outfit (or a total trainwreck of a garment) in an hour is fascinating. But what makes Project Runway great is when it’s filled with crazy people. This season may not be the craziest, but it definitely has its share of characters. Here are my top five favourite weirdos.

Kooan. I’m 95 per cent certain Kooan is actually a Harajuku Girl who escaped from Gwen Stefani. He left the show too soon! I wanted to see more brightly coloured jumpers with oversized buttons or whatever it was he was making.

Elena. Elena is an emotional basketcase. Most of the time she’s a mean girl who doesn’t play well with others and talks about how tough you have to be to survive in the Ukraine. I’m pretty sure she came up with the word “chiffonies” to describe the dudes on the show who are way into silk chiffon. But then she has random crying jags when things don’t go her way or when she has to design Wearable Clothes. Her clothes are mostly whatever…she’s really obsessed with shoulders for some reason…but I’m way into her bitchy, unpredictable personality.

Gunnar. I mean, his name is Gunnar Deatherage, so he seemed like a promising villain at first. He made up this random rivalry with Christopher, but that seems to have dropped off in recent weeks. He thinks he’s really fabulous, but he’s kind of just a shittier, tackier version of Christopher. Also: HIS HAIR. Ugh.

Dmitry. Dmitry is kind of the unsung hero of this season. The scene above was his shining moment, but he says unintentionally hilarious Russian-y things all the time. He’s an especially big fan of talking about how terrible Elena is behind her back. Also, while I feel like the judges are kind of ignoring him, I like his aesthetic! It’s kind of understated but elegant. I’m into it.

Ven. I couldn’t find a gif of Ven, which I assume is somehow related to the fact that….HE IS AN ANDROID. Ven is not capable of exhibiting or understanding human emotion, which leads to him saying things like, “I’m so excited about this challenge” in a complete monotone, or insulting the woman he’s designing for by basically calling her fat. Because he’s an android, all his clothes look pretty much the same – they all involve the same fold-y, flower-y technique.

As the season goes on and the pressure gets more intense, I can only assume things will escalate. I don’t really care who wins or anything (though I’m kind of into Sonjia – she’s pretty!). Mostly I’m just on Team Not Ven, because if the robots win, we all lose.


Sometimes I forget that not everyone watches, like, every show on television. I think this is because I read The A.V. Club a lot, and it makes me think that other people are watching Todd VanDerWerff levels of television. But based on conversations with my actual real life friends (yes, I have some of those) this is not true! For example, most of them have never even heard of Louie, which is just so mind-boggling to me that it usually causes me to yell at them for extended periods of time (hey, I never said I have a LOT of real life friends).

Anyway, my point is that if you’re not watching Louie, it’s time to start! The third season is airing right now, and every episode is like this little half hour masterpiece. If you’ve ever seen Louis C.K.’s stand-up (and if you haven’t, shame on you!) you know his humour tends to go beyond dark to pitch black. But also, he’s so funny, and so spot on. When he talks about his outlook on life, he manages to make observations that completely resonate with me, but which I am not even remotely clever enough to ever articulate myself. He talks about how OF COURSE he loves his young children but he also kind of hates them sometimes; about how people (himself included) don’t appreciate the wonders of modern technology; and he doesn’t mind admitting that being a white man is awesome. Um, I’m probably not making this sound funny. You should just watch him. He’s so funny, I promise.

On the show, he plays a version of himself. The world of Louie is similar to the real world, but everything is a little skewed, a little exaggerated, a little bizarre. In one episode, Louie watches a homeless man lose his head in a freak accident. In another, he babysits a child who eats raw meat. He has a super creepy sexual encounter with a woman who seems to have daddy issues, and in the next season, he goes on a trip to Ikea with her after she promises to give him a blow job. Probably my favourite scene of the series takes place while Louie is apartment hunting. At one point, he looks out the window and sees a homeless man standing on the street. A black town car pulls up, and men in suits take a similar-looking homeless guy out of the car, and usher the first one into the back seat before driving away.

This season has continued to be amazing. I especially loved the two episodes guest starring Parker Posey. Louie meets her character at the bookstore where she works in the midst of a quest to find a girlfriend, and immediately views her as his dream woman – smart, pretty and funny. Subsequent visits to the store seem to confirm that, as she recommends books for his daughter, and seems to be kind of into Louie.

But then he asks her out, and she goes from Manic Pixie Dream Girl to…mostly just manic. She’s refused service at the bar they go to because of whatever happened last time she was there, but she isn’t perturbed. She tells Louie about how she almost died from an illness as a teenager, which feels like it could be either a total lie or the absolute truth; she doesn’t seem to care as long as the spotlight’s on her and things are constantly happening. When Louie realizes he doesn’t even know her name, she makes up an elaborate lie about how her parents named her Tape Recorder. Oh, and she makes him try on a dress in a second-hand store.  Eventually, they end up on a rooftop, where Posey goes from manic to just sad.

THIS is good television. Louie is genuinely funny, but also intelligent, dark and, most importantly, innovative. There’s nothing else quite like it on TV, and that’s why you should be watching it.


Pretty much every post on this blog so far is about things I don’t particularly like. That’s because I find it sooo much easier to write about things I hate rather than things I actually, you know, like. It’s easy for me to point out the flaws in things that suck (in my opinion). It’s fine, I thrive on complaining about junk. When it comes to things I LIKE though, well, sometimes I just want to enjoy them and not analyze them or try to explain what I enjoy about them. But this week I’m going to try to be positive and write a few posts about stuff that I actually think is good. That was an eloquent way of putting it. Good job, Alex. OK, let’s do this.

Obviously, because I am a human being who’s alive in 2012, I love Breaking Bad. It’s pretty much the perfect show. I love the way the plot is constantly building up to some explosive event, and just when you think the show has reached its limit, something more insane happens. But it’s also all believable, at least within the universe of the show. The characters are so well-developed; even though it’s impossible to predict what they’ll do, once they do it, it always somehow makes sense.

Now that this season (or this half of the season, or whatever they’re calling it) is more than halfway done, I have to say I’m really into Skyler. Skyler is interesting because, while the other characters at least have SOME options, she doesn’t really have any. Walt could have gotten out of the meth biz after killing Gus; there’s no real reason why Jesse couldn’t walk away. Mike is sort of stuck, since he owes his guys a lot of money to stop them from talking, but at least he’s resourceful, he’s seen some shit.

Skyler’s situation is different. She could try to run away, but she’s obviously not going to leave her children, and how could she explain the situation to her teenage son, or keep her baby safe on the run? She’s gotten too involved now to turn Walt in – she willingly agreed to launder his meth money! Last season, Skyler viewed herself as a partner. But now that she realizes some of what Walt is capable of, she sees that she’s a hostage.

One of my favourite moments in this ridiculously amazing season was the conversation Walt and Skyler had after she walked into the pool while Hank and Marie were at the house (which was a totally genius move, by the way). As Skyler shouts her increasingly desperate options, she quickly realizes that she’s backed into a corner, that she doesn’t know what to do. She admits that she isn’t like Walt, that she can’t justify or lie her way out of the situation. Then, in what I think was Anna Gunn’s best moment in the whole series, she tells him all she can do is wait…and hope his cancer comes back.

I think I’m intrigued by Skyler because of how my attitude toward her has changed so drastically since Breaking Bad began. At first, she seemed like this stifling force, who was trying to suffocate a man who just wanted to provide for his family. That isn’t really a fair assessment, since her husband was literally cooking meth, but she didn’t KNOW that at the time. Even taking meth out of the equation, it seemed like she was used to controlling every situation, to having everything go her way, and when that didn’t happen, she was kind of an asshole.

Now that she doesn’t have control over anything, I have no idea what Skyler’s going to do next. She’s gotten the kids out of the house temporarily, having sent them to stay with Hank and Marie after convincing them she’s in need of psychological help, but it’s not really a permanent solution. Of course I’m still invested in Walt and Jesse, but for the time in the series, I’m really intrigued to see what Skyler does, too.


Some TV shows are like old friends. When you first met, it was magical. You couldn’t get enough of them. You had so much in common and they were so funny and quirky and interesting.

Over time, though, something changed. They changed, or maybe you did. What was once endearing became grating; what was once charming was now way too predictable. But you still make a lacklustre effort to hang out with them, out of habit or obligation or…whatever.

I’m pretty OK at cutting off contact with people I’ve grown apart from, but television is a different story. Even when a show I once liked becomes terrible, I can’t seem to let go. I watched V in its entirety. I watched Gossip Girl for four seasons, even after I realized every episode is structurally the same. The. Exact. Same. I’m still watching The Office for some unknown reason, even though the characters have basically become caricatures of themselves and I’ve had no interest in any of the plots since around the time Jim and Pam got married.

Weeds, however, is the absolute worst example of this kind of unhealthy relationship. (Yes, I have unhealthy relationships with TV shows. It’s fine.) The first four or five seasons were so great. I mean, come on, desperate suburban mom turns to dealing weed? That is a great premise. I was totally on board with the protagonist, Nancy Botwin, as she got caught up with gangs, married a DEA agent, burned her own house to the ground…hell, I was even into it that one time when a bunch of Mexicans almost killed her but then didn’t because she was pregnant with the mayor of Tijuana’s son. Phew.

The whole thing about Nancy is that she’s wildly self-absorbed, and manages to ruin the lives of pretty much everyone around her while getting caught up in a series of extremely close calls. She is this force who sets her eyes on something and is completely relentless until she achieves it. The lives of her brother-in-law, Andy, and her sons, Shane and Silas, have basically orbited around her for eight seasons. And while the people around her are in shambles (Andy’s in love with her, Shane briefly flirted with sociopathic tendencies and Silas seems to secretly crave her approval), Nancy carries on without many consequences. Even when she DOES come up across serious obstacles, she turns to selling weed as the solution. OK, she went to jail for three years, but the minute she got out, she started dealing again. Only now, in the eighth season, after LITERALLY GETTING SHOT IN THE HEAD has she started thinking maybe drug dealing isn’t for her.

That’s what’s become so annoying to me about the show, I think: Nancy Botwin is a terrible, terrible drug dealer. She has always set her sights too high, and things have gone atrociously wrong every time. After a decade of selling pot, she has nothing to show for it. Well, except a Mexican son. But seriously, she’s broke as shit. She’s lost everything she has over and over again, but it never occurs to her to try out a new career. There are only so many times you can watch someone smash their face into a brick wall before it gets old, you know?

Fortunately, this is the last season of Weeds, so my toxic relationship with it will be over soon. Do I really care what happens to anyone on this show? Um, no. But a small part of me hopes Nancy will at least go out without starting up another operation that’s sure to fail. That would at least give me lukewarm feelings about the series’ conclusion instead of rage-y feelings. But I mean, this is Weeds, so what are the chances Nancy will finally make a reasonable, well-thought-out decision? Unfortunately, slim to none.